It’s called Uncomfortable Willingness.

Being able to accept living in a state of emotional discomfort.

Ugh. As if any of us would want to do that!

What is that uncomfortable feeling?

It’s resistance + dread. And our ego is always on the lookout for anything that might make us appear ridiculous or put us in a state of discomfort. Take the first day of school butterflies or first day on the job jitters. No thanks! Emotional discomfort is that foreboding feeling of having to call a creditor to discuss a payment plan, or stage fright prior to giving a presentation. In a nutshell, it’s all the things we don’t want to do, but all the things that when we do them, bring us relief.

 Why is being emotionally uncomfortable good for you?

Because people who achieve their goals are willing to live in a state of emotional discomfort. Successful people, whether it be in relationships, business, education, you name it, accept that things take time, accept that there are growing pains, and as my mother always says, “sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to do,” in order to achieve, complete, move ahead, go beyond, obtain, or arrive to where it is you want to go in life.  Be who you want to be.

 It is possible to avoid these feeling?

No.  We’re human. But you can ease the feelings a bit by being PREPARED.   For example, if you study for a test, though you might be nervous about taking it, you increase your chances tremendously that you will do well if you study. If you’re giving a speech and you know your topic and you have rehearsed it over-and-over again, you may have butterflies in your stomach, but you will do well.

ACKNOWLEDGING the feeling helps too. Look it square in the eye – I get it, I’m scared about making this move, having to make a call, waiting for an answer… When I moved from L.A. to Russia I was excited but I was so nervous about the unknown and that I broke out in hives! It was better when I was able to say to myself, “I get it – I’m nervous. I’m embarking on something where there are many unknowns and I don’t speak the language, and, and, and… but I can handle it.”

DO SOMETHING once a day that puts you out of your comfort zone. It will help you learn to tolerate living in a state of uncomfortable willingness.

And above all, remember:

YOU CAN HANDLE IT and IT’S GOOD FOR YOU!

Love to know what you think about the idea of uncomfortable willingness and hear about times that you’ve had to live through something uncomfortable and how you coped. What you have to say may help others so leave a comment!  We’re all in this together.

All the best to you always xo,

Linda